Easy Leadership In The Home
Think about what your spouse sees
I spoke with 2 guys last week who have the same problem:
Their wife doesn’t think they’re leading their home effectively.
And both these guys are confused because they are actively trying to become better leaders.
They’re…
building toward fitness goals
improving their discipline and habits
leveling up their mindset and emotional control
But after prying into their day to day more, I realized there was something missing.
And they were both doing two very important things wrong.
Low Hanging Fruit
The two easiest ways for men to display leadership in the home:
Wake up before your wife and kids
Clean up after yourself
Both of these guys were letting their wife wake up before them (or sleeping until their kids woke them up).
And they were both letting dirty dishes pile up in the sink all day (wife goes into the office and they WFH).
It can be maddening to be working hard on fitness goals and showing up for yourself more.
And then be told you’re not doing enough.
Here’s how we fixed this problem.
See Their Perspective
In both these conversations, I had these athletes think about what their wife is seeing.
Here’s the visual…
She starts her day waking up and leaving for work while seeing her husband still wrapped under the covers
Then she returns home from a long and exhausting work day and what’s the first thing she sees?
A sink full of dirty dishes.
Ya… that looks lazy to me too.
Try Less Hard On What’s More Important
To fix this situation, we leaned on a lesson from endurance training.
You can run yourself into the ground trying to get a faster half marathon time in a 70.3.
But if you’re not becoming a biker (the majority of the race is on the bike), you are not going to get much better in the race overall.
So I had these guys redirect their attention.
Focus less on training and personal development books
Focus more on going first and not being a slob
And mentally/emotionally, they were able to drop the stress and confusion of feeling like they’re winning the battle but losing the war.
This is how we level up as men inside Tribal.
We have 70.3, Ironman and Ultramarathon goals.
But they’re not as important as being leaders for our families.
PS - the easiest way to not leave a sink full of dirty dishes is to not let a pile of dishes stack up to begin with.
My cooking video below shows my system for cleaning up as I cook.
It’s been a huge unlock for me.